Inspiring and Funny Quotes About Cleaning

Inspiration for the Reluctant Cleaner: Quotes About Cleaning

Are you someone who loves the idea of a spotless home but despises the effort it takes to achieve that? Maybe hiring a housekeeper isn’t in your budget, but that shouldn’t stop you from finding motivation! Here’s a collection of clever cleaning quotes that will inspire, entertain, and perhaps even make you chuckle. Personally, I don’t love cleaning, but the satisfaction of a tidy space makes the effort worthwhile in the end. Whether you find joy in cleaning or view it as a chore, there’s a quote here that will surely resonate with you.

Funny Quotes About Cleaning That’ll Make You Laugh

  • “Housework can’t kill you, but why take a chance?” – Phyllis Diller
  • “Nature abhors a vacuum. And so do I.” – Anne Gibbons
  • “My daughter wanted a Cinderella-themed party, so I invited all her friends over and made them clean the house.” – Unknown
  • “Cleaning up with children around is like shoveling during a blizzard.” – Margaret Culkin Banning
  • “Nothing inspires cleanliness more than an unexpected guest.” – Radhika Mundra
  • “Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing.” – Phyllis Diller
  • “My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.” – Erma Bombeck
  • “Excuse the mess, but we live here.” – Roseanne Barr
  • “Cleaning the house fascinates everyone in my family. They can sit and watch me for hours.” – Unknown
  • “Housework is like cleaning fish. No matter how often you do it, it still stinks.” – Thelma Harper
  • “Everyone wants to save the earth; no one wants to help mom do the dishes.” – P.J. O’Rourke
  • “First rule of housecleaning while listening to music: the toilet brush is never the microphone.” – Unknown
  • “Dust is a protective coating for fine furniture.” – Mario Buatta
  • “I’m not going to vacuum until Sears makes one you can ride on.” – Roseanne Barr
  • “I hate housework. You make the beds, you wash the dishes, and six months later, you have to start all over again.” – Joan Rivers

More Funny Cleaning Quotes

  • “This is a self-cleaning kitchen. Clean up after yourself.” – Unknown
  • “Don’t you wish you could finish cleaning the house and just hit the ‘save’ button?” – Unknown
  • “If your house is really a mess and a stranger comes to the door, greet him with, “Who could have done this? We have no enemies.” – Phyllis Diller
  • “My kitchen was clean last week. Sorry, you missed it.” – Unknown
  • “Housework is what a woman does that nobody notices unless she hasn’t done it.” – Evan Esar
  • “The day I worry about cleaning my house is the day Sears comes out with a riding vacuum cleaner.” – Roseanne Barr
  • “Don’t confuse my desire for a clean house as a desire to clean up after you.” – Unknown
  • “A man thinks all dust stays outdoors.” – Ernest Vincent Wright
  • “I’m eighteen years behind in my ironing. There’s no use doing it now; it doesn’t fit anybody I know.” – Phyllis Diller

Inspirational Cleaning Quotes to Get You Moving

  • “Cleaning is my favorite way to relax. I clear things out and get rid of the stuff I don’t need. When the food pantry and the refrigerator are organized, I feel less stressed.” – Jennifer Morrison
  • “The way to get started is to quit talking and start doing.” – Walt Disney
  • “I make no secret of the fact that I would rather lie on a sofa than sweep beneath it. But you have to be efficient if you’re going to be lazy.” – Shirley Conran
  • “We dream of having a clean house – but who dreams of actually doing the cleaning? We don’t have to dream about doing the work because doing the work is always within our grasp; the dream, in this sense, is to attain the goal without the work.” – Marcus Buckingham
  • “When your environment is clean, you feel happy, motivated, and healthy.” – Lailah Gifty Akita
  • “The objective of cleaning is not just to clean, but to feel happiness living within that environment.” – Marie Kondo
  • “Don’t let perfect be the enemy of the good. Lower the bar. Actually spending ten minutes clearing off one shelf is better than fantasizing about spending a weekend cleaning out the basement.” – Gretchen Rubin
  • “When all else fails, cleaning house is the perfect antidote to most of life’s ills.” – Sue Grafton
  • “Clean your screens as if you are cleaning your soul, allowing the air to flow through freely.” – Shoukei Matsumoto

Famous Quotes About Cleaning

  • “Housekeeping is like being caught in a revolving door.” – Marcelene Cox
  • “Cleaning and organizing is a practice, not a project.” – Meagan Francis
  • “There is no daily chore so trivial that it cannot be made important by skipping it two days running.” – Robert Brault
  • “My idea of superwoman is someone who scrubs her own floors.” – Bette Midler
  • “Housework, if you do it right, can kill you.” – Erma Bombeck
  • “You don’t get anything clean without getting something else dirty.” – Cecil Baxter
  • “I always clean before the cleaning lady comes. If not, when I come home, I can’t find anything. Cleaning ladies are always hiding things you leave out.” – Celia Cruz
  • “Housework is a treadmill from futility to oblivion with stop-offs at tedium and counter-productivity.” – Erma Bombeck
  • “Have you ever taken anything out of the clothes basket because it had become, relatively, the cleaner thing?” – Katherine Whitehorn
  • “A spotless house is a sign of a misspent life.” – Unknown
  • “Sweeping only moves the dust somewhere else.” – Marty Rubin
  • “A bright person can always think of something better to do than housework.” – Ruby Lou Barnhill
  • “Housekeeping ain’t no joke.” – Louisa May Alcott
  • “Few tasks are more like the torture of Sisyphus than housework, with its endless repetition: the clean becomes soiled, the soiled is made clean, over and over, day after day.” – Simone de Beauvoir
  • “At worst, a house unkept cannot be so distressing as a life unlived.” – Rose Macaulay
  • “I have sporadic OCD cleaning moments around the house. But then I get lazy and I’m cured. It’s a very inconsistent personality trait.” – Chris Hemsworth
  • “A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.” – Mark Twain
  • “Cleaning anything involves making something else dirty, but anything can get dirty without something else getting clean.” – Laurence J. Peter

Share Your Favorite Cleaning Quotes

Feel free to pick a few of your favorite cleaning quotes and jot them down for easy reference the next time you need a boost of motivation or a good laugh. If you have a favorite quote that isn’t listed here, drop it in the comments so we can all enjoy it!


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